Trust

If someone loses my trust, is that more valuable than if I lose someone else's trust?  My ego would say, "Of course, my trust better damn well be worth a lot!"  But you must also consider that you have a reputation to maintain and a conscience to pacify.

As we grow out of childhood, we learn, often by firsthand experience, that other people can hurt us.  Sometimes they hurt us by accident due to lack of foresight.  Sometimes they hurt us out of necessity so we can grow up.  And sometimes they hurt us for their own benefit.  It is this last scenario that wrings out the innocent trust we have for others in our hearts and tints it with suspicion.

Can I blame someone for looking out for Number 1 if it is at my expense?  They were only abiding by the rules of Survival of the Fittest.  I would definitely still feel angry, and justifiably so since I need to look out for Number 1 as well.  But there is an emptiness that is left behind when trust is lost.

Interestingly, older people are more trusting than younger people, even though they have had more chances to be hurt in life.  A more optimistic view could be that they have had more opportunities and life experiences to see the good intentions of others prevail.  As B.C. Forbes puts it, "Better to be occasionally cheated than perpetually suspicious." The following article talks about the demographics of trusting people: http://pop17.com/social-trust-who-trusts/.

As unemotional as this post has been, it does honestly hurt like a son of a bee sting to learn that a friend or confidant has betrayed your trust.  I do believe that if people felt truly sorry for their actions, trust can quickly be rebuilt on a more solid foundation.  In the grown up world, though, there is no teacher to say who was right or wrong; there is no feeling of justice.  Without remorse, what is the value of forgiveness?  And without forgiveness, how can we truly trust again?

http://pop17.com/social-trust-who-trusts/